Shortcut to Websites
by Illavyn Velendril
Summary: A hobbit reunion leads to some mis-discovery about the power of Google. Please be gentle! It's my first story and a one-shot. I'll be writing some real fic fic soon... :


**Disclaimer:** I don't own these actors.... even though sometimes I wish I did. Also don't own Scotland, hobbits or LOTR.

Shortcut to Websites

Elijah was bored again. He, Dom, Billy, and Sean were supposed to be having a great "hobbit reunion" and on the second day, when they all were supposed to go out, it rains. Sean was hogging the bathroom for at least another hour and he, Billy, and Dom had run out of things to say. So, of course, everyone was surrounding Lij's cool new computer and surfing the internet. "So… how long ago did you get this, again?" asked Dom for the 5th time.

"5 months, Dom." Answered Billy, "At this point, even _I _could answer that."

"Oh…" said Dom, "I was just trying to make conversation, though."

"Hey guys," said Lij slowly, "I think I have an idea that could amuse us for a while…" Dom and Billy looked confused as Lij opened up a new browser window. They knew that no good was coming as he went to ''

"Lij… what on earth?" asked Billy as Lij typed in "Dominic Monaghan" in the search box.

"I want to see how many results come up… it will be fun!" said Lij, eyes shining.

"This is stupid," said Dom, leaning back in his chair.

"Do you have any better ideas?" shot back Lij.

"No, but… why me?"

"Because," said Billy, "you can be embarrassed and if you're scarred emotionally, not too many fangirls will be upset."

"Uhhhhhh… sure!" said Lij, as he clicked 'search'. They waited about 3 seconds and were shocked as Google came up with 186, 000 websites.

"WOAH!!" shouted Dom, standing and sprinting over to the computer, "Lemmie see that!" He scanned the results. "I have fan sites?!"

"Well someone's feeling rather slow…" said Billy laughing.

"No, but… 186, 000?! Holy Crap! Do Billy now!"

"Now, wait just a minute…" said Billy turning serious, but Elijah's typing was too fast for him. Billy's jaw dropped as he saw 653, 000 results for his name pop up. "Oh my God!" breathed Billy as he scanned his results. "?? That's not right…" said Billy as his face contorted to something similar to fear.

"I don't like it," said Dom warily, "It's not natural."

"Well, I could log off…" said Lij, moving the mouse toward the 'X' button in the right hand corner.

"No!" Billy grabbed the mouse away before Lij could click, "We have some research about Elijah Wood to do before we do that…"

Elijah paled, "Guys, seriously… don't. I could be scarred forever if you do this."

"Stop being a baby, Lij," Billy said, "besides, you searched us. How bad can it be?"

"No, but you have no idea-" he stopped mid-word as Google came up with 1,780,000 websites involving him. Billy and Dom slowly turned around to look at Elijah's white, stunned face. Lij made an odd squeaking sound and barely managed to find a chair to sit down in. He looked kind of green so Billy went off to fetch a cool rag and a bucket, in case he "lost his lunch".

"Ohmigod…" Elijah breathed over and over again as he rocked back and forth.

Then, Sean walked in. "Hey guys!" He spotted his hyperventilating friend, "Whoa, what happened to Lij?"

"We googled him." Dom was trying to figure out a way to calm his friend, by rubbing his back, without seeming gay.

"... "Googled"? Is that what you kids are calling it, these days?" The older Sean Astin smirked, awaiting a comeback.

"I'm serious Sean! We just put our names in Google and...."

"What's the big freak-out for? I'm sure there are like a thousand websites. We're actors, that's how it works!" Sean rolled his eyes and then started to the computer. "I'll do me. Here... 'Sean As-tin'." He spelled his name out and clicked enter emphatically. And then his jaw dropped. "Wh-... What the hell?"

Dom smirked. "Who's speechless now, Mr. Famous? How many?"

Sean shook his head. "610,000 results. I just... wow. What the hell is this about my family vacation?!?!"

He started clicking furiously and muttering as Billy returned with the bucket and washrag.

"Why are there so many? Why? What.... why?" Lij was saying over and over to himself, rocking back and forth.

"Billy, you take over here. I'm hungry." Dom stood up and ran to make himself a manly meatball sandwich to reassure himself of just how masculine he was.

Billy shrugged and crouched down to Lij's level. "Well, Lij, all I can say is that in Scotland, we have a saying, that might help in a situation like this one."

Lij sniffled. "What is it?"

Billy cleared his throat. "Keep yer am fish-guts for yer air sea-maws."

Lij paused. "Oddly... I don't know what that means, but it makes me feel better."

Billy just nodded and smiled as Dom returned with his sandwich and Sean used the bucket to lose his own lunch.


End file.
